I recently was feeling overwhelmed and sad with some events I have coming up that I needed to attend and didn't really feel like attending because I would be "dateless". Hubby must have been feeling me pulling on his heartstrings that day because he called me on our "non-scheduled phone call day".
You see, once you have been married or in a relationship with the same person for a third of your life, it doesn't seem normal to go to these special events without them... frankly doing a lot of things doesn't feel normal...like going to church, going to your favorite lunch spot, even going to bed...you get the picture.
I think the hardest part about going to these events is explaining to everyone, "No, I don't get to talk to my husband everyday, Skype isn't all it's cracked up to be, yes I am okay, but I stay strong for my children."
What makes these events easier are great friends who call and offer to drive you, skip the event with you or offer to babysit the kids while you go. These friends are priceless!!
Hubby reminded me it is very normal to feel sad and lonely and it is OKAY to decline that invitation to that special event coming up. It is NOT okay to ignore that these events are happening though, these events mean something to someone... So that is the balance we try to create during deployments, honor events and occasions in a way we are comfortable with while making sure we gently let others understand our absence.
Very well said. Although I can't empathize, I can sympathize. I hope that when school is out and you have the girls with you more, it will lessen the emptiness a bit. God bless you for giving up your time with your husband, and God bless your husband for giving up his time with his family, all in order to keep us all safe! I am so grateful that there are people who are willing to 'answer the call' for our country!
ReplyDeleteI love that you blog about this. It is so honest and transparent and gives such a great perspective to someone who can't possibly understand all of these things without going through them.
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